Archives for category: thoughts

Long before we have even roasted the turkey, we are pushed to go shopping for Holiday gift-giving. I am feeling old and stodgy when I say that (in my day…) we used to celebrate one holiday at a time. But I am not so jaded… (And I am not THAT old!)

At the same time that we are distracted from enjoying the holidays by believing we already need to be preparing the “stuff” for the next one, it is heartening to see a new wave of mindfulness.

On Thanksgiving,  my sister-in-law’s young grandson showed us the yoga pose he had learned in school. A client, who is a teacher, informed me that they teach  meditation techniques in the Head Start program where she works. I see hope.

What do you really want out of the Holiday Season? What is the meaning for you? Are you diminishing the value of the season for yourself in getting distracted by all the To-Dos?

Just as I once read in tips for meditation: 15 minutes per day is great, unless you are very busy, then 30 minutes per day is suggested.

My advice: Slow down. Take time to recharge–sharpen the saw, as Stephen Covey called it. Meditate for 5 minutes before getting out of the car after parking. Stop and take 6 conscious breaths. Pause and notice the sunrise.

The renewed energy and clarity of mind will make up for the time spent. And, who knows, you might just enjoy the Holidays more!


Personally, I am still celebrating the achievement of a goal—becoming a licensed Acupuncturist and Practitioner of Oriental Medicine. So, in addition to my services as a Life Coach, I will now be able to support clients using this medicine.

I am proud of my accomplishments, which included the completion of a four-year graduate program, close to one thousand clinic hours, treating hundreds of patients, and passing four national certification board exams. Unlike some goals in my life, I was extraordinarily prepared to pursue this one.

The goal of becoming an Acupuncture & Oriental Medicine Practitioner was not the first one for me that really grabbed my attention, this time, however, I was more ready to really achieve. As I discuss with my clients, there is no wrong choice. If it makes your heart sing, you can achieve it. The path may not always be easy to travel, and yet, if you stay focused on your vision, you can achieve it.

A few things that I recommend to maintain focus:

  1. Reconnect with your vision, the “Why” of your goal
  2. Keep things in perspective
  3. Stay mindful of accomplishments

1. What does the achievement of your goal mean to you? What will change? What will your life be like once you reach your goal? This is what I mean by your vision or the “Why” of your goal. This is your intrinsic motivation to strive toward a goal or to make any change. Reconnect with your vision often to maintain motivation and alignment with your dream. With my clients I compare this to autopilot in a plane. You set the course, and keep checking in to adjust for environmental influences. A plane will continually get slightly off course, due to air currents, for example, and the autopilot will make the needed adjustments to keep the flight on track.

2. This leads to keeping things in perspective. Understand that it is possible to reach a goal despite getting slightly off course every now and then. Sometimes, it may be necessary to veer around an obstacle. Be like an autopilot—it does not feel guilty or worthless for straying slightly. The autopilot checks in with the desired coordinates and realigns. There are no doubts about the coordinates—these are as valid as they were in the beginning.

This is where reconnecting with your vision will rekindle your passion, helping you keep things in perspective. A bump in the road is simply that. It does not need to be a sign that you shouldn’t take that road. Remember that any goal will require your commitment and continued pursuit to be achieved. This is part of learning and growing. If you already had all the skills and knowledge you need to achieve your goal, then you are not growing as a person. No change would be necessary. So, keep things in perspective. You are capable and worthy of your dream.

3. Stay mindful of your accomplishments along the way. Notice your gained competence. Now you are able to do _______________, or at first doing ____________________ was slow and difficult, now it comes naturally. Celebrate.

You were perfectly fine with your skillset and knowledge before; you have, however, added to your portfolio. Revel in the achievement. You are one step closer to reaching your goal. This is the fun. As the saying goes, it is the journey that is the adventure.

As you progress, and continually reconnect with your vision, maintain perspective, and celebrate accomplishments, you will notice how quickly you move toward you goal. Before you know it, you will be setting your sights on the next target.

Enjoy the journey!

Like the drawing in of a breath that allows the body to function, inspiration also refers to “the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, especially something creative.” A creative act is not simply limited to art or writing–each and everyone of us engages in creative activities on a regular basis, whether we are aware of it, or not.

We create experiences for ourselves and others with each thought and interaction.

Today I was obviously inspired. I listened to a recording from a respected spiritual teacher, which opened my awareness of my gifts and possibility. Before class, my colleagues and I chatted and caught up on happenings, feelings, and thoughts. It feels good to be part of a group of interesting, intelligent, and talented individuals. The professor and class content then lit the fire of my fueled and loaded rocket. Within minutes I was zooming out to an excitingly distant orbit! That energy spilled out into each interaction thereafter. Each conversation ended with both of us smiling. I was very productive and happy.

Flying high provides an expanded perspective of opportunity and possibility, which motivates action and positive emotion. This is reflected in your mood, behavior, and the way you relate to other people and events. This is the exact opposite of feeling stuck, unhappy, and tempted to procrastinate. This is being inspired to creativity.

You know what I mean. Don’t you just want to be around someone, who is happy and motivated? Doesn’t it make you feel good? Don’t you see more opportunity? Don’t you notice that you then run into more happy people that day and things flow smoothly?

Each of us has something completely unique that we can share with the world. It doesn’t matter if the world we directly reach consists of a spouse, a neighbor, 50 employees, or the nation. We each make an impact. Decide if you want to make that impact feeling unhappy and stuck, or happy and motivated. Either way, you are creating that experience.

You choose to what you listen, and with whom you surround yourself, to name a couple influences. Do you feel inspired by these people and thoughts? If not, find those that are inspiring. Be selfish. The world needs you to take care of you. The world needs you at your best.

If you started smelling a bad smell, you probably wouldn’t breathe deeply, right? If you don’t find fresh air, you will be depriving your body of the oxygen it requires, and its functioning begins to falter. Similarly, without mental inspiration, your emotional and creative well-being suffers, and the people around you are robbed of the optimal you. So, your responsibility is to find what makes you happy and do it–that is your “work.” By keeping yourself inspired, you inspire others, and around it goes.

Follow what strikes your chord, and that will get your world humming.



Each moment is created from the alphabet soup of the cosmos. Each moment is a pulling together from the soup of stuff that makes up our lives, our world, our universe.

As I sit and contemplatively chew my breakfast, I glance at the jumble of letters on the table. The letter tiles from the game of Bananagrams are spread out and available to play at any moment. Effortlessly I form words from the randomly placed letters. In an instant my mind forms words with no pattern or purpose; creating order out of seeming chaos.

It occurred to me that this is the opportunity we have in each and every moment of our lives. We get to pull from the possibilities of life to create our day. And regardless of the result, in the next moment, we, again, have the ability to pull from all possibilities that we allow. Each moment is a new moment. Each day is a new day.


How freeing.

This means there is no missing out, no wrong-doings, and no failure. We experience a momentary compilation. If it is not in alignment with what we want, it is a mistake, and we move to the next moment and the next chance to compile anew.

AND we are not limited to a predefined alphabet! In life, we potentially have an infinite range of possibilities at our metaphorical fingertips.

Since these possibilities are available to us in each moment, we can safely be in the moment, fully immersed in the experience. We are and have everything in that moment, in the specific combination we created. And yet, it is like a thought–here in an instant and so fleeting that before we know it, another thought takes its place. So the momentary combination is everything and nothing–a creation like the words I formed. They have a certain semantic value for us and we can continually rearrange and reuse the letters of the alphabet to create an infinite flow of words. And we can play with the syntax of combining and recombining those words in an infinite flow of sentences, and so on.

Enjoy, play, and experience each and every moment of your life, knowing that each new moment brings the possibility to create anew.



Sound familiar? You are in a foreign country and your phrasebook query elicits smiles, whispers, and children’s wide-eyed fascination. The person, to whom you are speaking, gently tells you that instead of saying “Thank you,” you spoke of diarrhea. After a shocked moment, you all have a good laugh and end up discussing life over a bottle of wine.

I wish these moments on everyone. For me they represent the connection that can be possible anywhere, anytime, with anyone. How would you like to live in that kind of world?! A world, in which a miscommunication is simply that–and maybe even a chance to talk more, to clarify, to connect, to discover–yourself and others.


What is different about communicating in a foreign country and communicating on your own turf? I believe it is the willingness to hear past the semantics, and to give the speaker the benefit of the doubt.

My assertion is that if we view each person as a Culture of One and if we communicate as if interacting with a foreign language and customs, we would have that connected world.

When dealing with an obvious difference of language or culture, the willingness to understand and to see the similarities in another person is more prevalent, despite the potential faux pas that can occur. This leads to a friendly or neutral interaction. It seems clear that if a person is raised with a different language in a different culture, her words and behavior may have a different connotation than mine. So, I don’t take things personally. I ask questions to clarify meaning and intent.

We each have a unique set of circumstances and experiences that gives rise to a very specific perspective that is reflected in everything we say, all our behaviors and reactions, and our interpretations. These interpretations fine-tune our perspective, and around it goes.

So, Jane Doe may have been born in 1983 in the U.S.A. with hundreds of other children, AND she was raised in New Hampshire, AND in the town of Bakersville, AND in the school district of Mount Washington, AND in the Family Doe, AND on Maple Street, AND…, AND in her own head. Each sphere represents an added layer of “culture.” The overlap of shared perspective is diminished with each layer. Jane Doe lives in her own unique point of view framed by her own unique set of beliefs. Her culture is, therefore, similar and yet unlike that of John Smith, also born in 1983 in the U.S.A.

images.culture speech balloon

If you grew up using the same language as another person, it is easy to believe that she has the same connotations for each word as you do. That leads to arguments and being right about what another person said.

How often do you experience a person angrily saying, “But you said _______!” only to hear the rebuttal, “I never said that!” This is not communication, and it causes a disconnect.
Communication happens when the message that Person A sends, can be repeated by Person B, and Person A can say, “Yes, that is what I said.” This requires listening and being open to the meaning behind the words. It requires the willingness to understand a different perspective.

Speaking the same language obscures the fact that we each have a unique perspective and subtly different connotations and interpretations. It is BECAUSE we believe we are speaking the same language and meaning the same thing, that we feel justified in our position, and communication breaks down.

Applying the concept of Culture of One would allow us to step back. In the space we create, there is room to seek clarification and hopefully to deepen connection.



Looking through my photos, an obvious theme emerges: Nature, and specifically Sunrise. If I am not directly viewing one, I live vicariously through FB Friends. I never tire of sunrise.

Each and every moment leading up to the sun peaking over the horizon, is savored. Captivating. The play of subtle shades on the water accentuates the lines of the waves and lends an air of an oil painting to the ocean and sky. The sights, smells, sounds, and feel of the breeze combine to engage all senses in a perfectly orchestrated commencement of each day. Not foretelling, but rather reaching perfection in each step; a string of complete experiences unfolding into a whole, perfect story.

Such is each and every moment of our lives. I believe that to savor each moment as the complete experience that it is, would be the way to honor and enjoy the whole, perfect story of life and ourselves.

There is no condition to meet for perfection to exist. There is nothing to do. It is a matter of perspective. To be open to perceiving the beauty and perfection is not always our first reaction, and yet it is there. Remind yourself of other instances in which, in retrospect, things turned out exactly as–or even better–than desired/imagined.

Breathe deep, and take a closer look/listen/sniff/feel. This moment is unique. It may be difficult to see a sharp, uncomfortable situation as perfect. It is like a tile in the mosaic of your story. Seen alone, it may not convey much, and as part of the whole, it is exactly right–lending contrast, framing, enhancing, continuing a theme, adding accent, etc.

Live and enjoy each moment. And in this way, your perfect life story will unfold and be told.



My last post was about paying attention to what is directly in front of you, and not looking ahead into the future. The point was that if we don’t take care of the immediate task or deal with what is on our plate now, it changes our trajectory.

Did you wonder how a Life Coach could advocate for anything other than setting a goal and working towards it?!

Please understand, I am all about having a vision, dreams, goals, desires, and wishes! And I believe you must have clarity around these in order to realize them. By advocating for shortsightedness, I am, in no way, wanting you to ignore the steps of clarifying, stating, and working toward your goals. Yet, I am advocating letting go and allowing the unfolding of the path to your goals.

You may have heard the analogy of GPS, when discussing the path to manifesting your dreams. This is the way in which I understood my experience that I outlined in the last post titled Be Shortsighted.

Based on our experiences, we begin to define our desires. Very clearly we paint a picture of what we DO want by experiencing or learning what we do NOT want. Experience helps us whittle out our wants. This clarity is analogous to entering the destination in your GPS–or planting a homing device on our goal. Once we have planted that homing device we surrender the path and the details to the Universal GPS.

We then fill our tank with the excitement of being at our destination–how it feels, looks, sounds, etc. to be there. And we start our engines and roll on down the road. We trust our GPS to stay honed in on our destination. Our job is to keep the tank filled and keep making miles! [Filling the tank is where a vision board, for example, is helpful. Making miles means that you keep showing up, acting in alignment with your values, making yourself available for serendipity.]

That’s where shortsightedness or concentration on the task at hand comes in. We maneuver the car safely through traffic. This requires attention to what is right in front of you.
Even if our goal is a new job, we continue to show up and perform our current job as best we can. Secure in the knowing that we will be shown the next move; our GPS will tell us when to exit or make the turn.

Along the way, we may have to make a detour. Our GPS stays focused on our destination and recalculates the new, most direct route. We can sit back, and let ourselves be guided. If we become attached to a particular path or outcome, we limit the possibilities, and may delay an even better outcome than we could even imagine.

It is in the allowing of events to unfold that the magic happens. We must only continue to keep up the excitement of the overall feeling of the outcome, and keep showing up and being available for interactions. So, getting that new job, may come via that promotion you’ve been working toward, OR maybe a current client is so impressed with your professionalism that they want to hire you for a newly created position in their company, OR maybe there are other possibilities!

Keep up the excitement of being at your goal, keep moving forward, listen to the GPS, and you will reach your desired destination–AND it may be different and better than you ever imagined!

Happy Trails

Driving from Tennessee back to Florida I had some time to reflect on life. So I was wide open to ideas and impressions. A good thing, since one never knows when an inspiration will strike. Luckily, I was aware enough to get the inspiration and not get into an accident.

I was driving on a two-lane road, which was a switch after miles of multi-lane highway, and for some reason I was focused on the van in front of the car in front of me. I saw it slowing down, and reacted accordingly. Yet, I was so focused on the van, and was not paying complete attention to the car directly in front of me.

The car was braking at a much faster rate than the van–or I! In that moment of readjustment, I realized that I/we often tend to do the same thing in life–we focus on something that “will happen” in the future and ignore what is happening right now, right in front of us, directly under our noses.

If I had not been mindful of the car in front of me, I would have crashed into it, and it wouldn’t have mattered what the van was doing, I would have altered my trajectory. Likewise, when you focus on something that may or may not happen in the future, you ignore the now–the steps that lead you into the future. You alter your trajectory.

By staying mindful of the present, the here and now, you lay the foundation for the future of your making, not one overly influenced by external circumstances; you follow your path step by step. You stay in alignment with your self, with your values. You create what you desire  by staying true to now, with no attachment to a specific outcome

Letting go to receive.

Be shortsighted. Be in the now.

PRISM for your Mind: NSA, WikiLeaks and Israel

Brilliant white light filters through a prism,
To emerge redirected, refracted as ROYGBIV,
The colors of the rainbow.
The colors of the chakras.
The colors of peace, joy, and happiness.
The arc leading to the proverbial pot of gold,
Lighting up the sky and children’s faces,
As the sun reaches out to catch a raindrop.

What color are you?
How can you be limited to just one?
Are we not each composed of ROYGBIV,
Regardless of how red-blooded, true-blue,
Or green with envy we may seem?
Categories of separated wavelengths,
Walls dividing light give permission to compare,
Form fractional factions, fear.
Division serves to isolate, dissociate, weaken, kill joy.

Remember from whence the colors come.
Trace your steps to the beginning.
Wholeness—not a splitting or splintering into individual pieces—
Is our true nature.
Acknowledge and accept all parts of yourself;
See similarities with others, find common ground;
Barriers dissolve like cumulus clouds after a storm.
Remember. Redirect. Reverse-refract. Reconnect.
Rainbows reconnected emerge as brilliant white light.



I am going to go out on a limb—or a flagpole, as it were. I just heard again some coverage regarding South Carolina and the flag. The person being interviewed said that it should not be at the State Capitol, which is a place for everyone, and no one should have to drive past there and feel pain. But rather it should be in a museum where it can be honored appropriately.

First of all, what is appropriate? For whom? At what time?

Second, how are you going to affect that someone honors the flag in whatever way is deemed appropriate?

In addition, if someone feels pain, is it because of the symbol or is it because of what they tell themselves, what story they have about that symbol in their mind? So, what should be changed: The story or the symbol?

What are symbols anyway? Isn’t it just something that evokes a story in our mind? So, what is it that has the power: The symbol or the story?

I remember a while ago hearing a story about a black man, who adopted the Confederate flag, or whatever it’s called, because it is not just the Confederate flag, it was a flag before that and there is a name for it (I must research this further). He adopted it as his own; he had it proudly waving on his car. As you can imagine, some Blacks on one side, and some Whites on the other side, had different reactions to his adoption of that symbol.

He owned that flag. He refused to let someone else tell him what story to make up about it. It was amusing to see how, on the one hand, some people were horrified that he could adopt it. But he realized it was just a symbol, and he hoped others would embrace the same philosophy towards this symbol. It was amazing how some of the white men he encountered all of a sudden rejected the symbol; they wanted to have nothing to do with it. So, he helped them change their story about it. He might not have changed their way of thinking immediately, but at least the symbol they had wielded like a weapon was relinquished. This can ultimately diffuse the hate and fear behind a symbol, because it no longer has one rationale on which to cling or one single story which to propagate. Rather than upholding mental bondage, a symbol is slowly sapped of power.

Is that not the more effective way of honoring a symbol? To see it for what it is?

The more we uphold what it stands for—the story based on one time frame, based on hate and fear—the more that is real. And directly or indirectly, even if you don’t want to, that upholds it, that honors that story of hate and fear. What he was doing was turning it into love—seeing the reality occluded by the fear. He was seeing it for the symbol that it was—nothing more and nothing less.

In the same way, that is the lesson we can implement in our every day lives: to take behaviors that we see from our friends, family, and colleagues as symbols. We are the ones, who write the story about it. We are the ones who interpret it, attach meaning to it for ourselves. They are just symbols and we make of them what we want to make of them.

The person in traffic who …, the friend who didn’t …, or the colleague who …

What story are you telling yourself? Is it based on Fear, or is it based on Love?  ~BlinkNFlow

Idiom: Whistling Dixie–If someone is whistling Dixie, they talk about things in a more positive way than the reality. [Whose reality? ;-)]